Wednesday, January 28, 2009

What Do Women Want? Carolyn Jean & Little CJ discuss the NYT article

So did anybody see the New York Times Sunday Magazine article, What Do Women Want? I would suggest checking it out--very fascinating, all about women and desire, and figuring out what turns women on and why.

Little CJ: Oh yeah? Did they figure out why cartoon porn movies where hentai elfs are tied up by robbers and ravished are so hot?

Carolyn Jean: What are you talking about?

Little CJ: Oh. Uh, never mind.

Carolyn Jean: Well, actually the article is sort of about that. It seems that women are aroused physiologically by a wider range of stimuli than men.

Little CJ: Like what?

Carolyn Jean: Well, in tests that measured subjective (reported) and objective (bodily) response, men were predictably aroused by photos of men and women having sex, women and women have sex, and a naked woman exercising.

Little CJ: Well hot diggity damn! There’s a shocker.

Carolyn Jean: But women were physically aroused when shown scenes of men with men, women with women and women with men. They were more aroused by an exercising woman than a chiseled-faced, strolling man, and even aroused by the sight of bonobo apes having sex.

Little CJ: Mmmm, bonobo apes.

Carolyn Jean: But they generally reported only being aroused by the men and women having sex. They would not tell all. Or, they didn’t realize.

Little CJ: Bonobos are hairy all over.

Carolyn Jean: There are a number of interesting perspectives on forced seduction, which of course people argue about a lot here on the blogs as far as storylines in romances. One researcher speculates on how physical arousal (as opposed to mental arousal) during forced seduction relates to evolutionary biology. It was totally fascinating.

Little CJ: I’m into Cornelius, from Planet of the Apes. I think his hands would be super leathery, like really hard gloves, don’t you think so? But really furry, too.

Carolyn Jean: You have been hanging on that wall too long.

Little CJ: Well over three decades, dude!

Carolyn Jean: So you like to say. Meredith Chivers, psychology professor at Queen’s University in Ontario, suggests that, while the actual experience of forced seduction isn’t wanted, such fantasies offer “a pure glimpse into desire” and suggest it comes out of a “wish to be beyond will, beyond thought, to be all in the midbrain.”

Little CJ: Midbrain. Whatever. I like the leather outfits that Cornelius wears. A lot. Do you know what I’m saying?

Carolyn Jean: Marta Meana, a professor of psychology at the University of Nevada at Las Vegas, suggests that women’s desire “is not relational, but narcissistic and that it’s 'dominated by the yearnings of “self-love,” by the wish to be the object of erotic admiration and sexual need.' Quoting from the article:
A symbolic scene ran through Meana’s talk of female lust: a woman pinned against an alley wall, being ravished. Here, in Meana’s vision, was an emblem of female heat. The ravisher is so overcome by a craving focused on this particular woman that he cannot contain himself; he transgresses societal codes in order to seize her, and she, feeling herself to be the unique object of his desire, is electrified by her own reactive charge and surrenders.
Little CJ: But it would be weird to kiss him, because he kind of has that snout. But you never know. It could be advantageous in certain ways.

Carolyn Jean: *shocked look*


Anonymous said...

You are way too entertaining for words, lol! Great conversation. And honestly, aside from the apes--yeesh--I can see the why's of what women found stimulating.

Renee said...

Carolyn Jean, you are so awesome!

What a thought provoking post. Biological imperative seems to have much more of an impact on women and arousal than most of us (at least I) would like to recognize. I never considered myself as one who had a biological clock ticking (I never had "baby lust" like some of my friends), but in terms of arousal/interest I guess there's no denying biology.

While I get their point, I'm still having trouble/issues with getting my mind around the issue of forced seduction, tho'.

Narcissism? Self-love? Yeah, well...::shrugs::

::whispers:: Hey Lil CJ, I'm ignoring all Cornelius references, but hentai elves on cartoon porn? I'm intrigued...

Jill Sorenson said...

Is it weird that I liked the girl ape? *g*

Did you read the part of the article that said some women can "think" themselves into orgasm?

OMG. skillz.

JenB said...

I think pretty much all [human] sex is sexy. The love scenes in gay shows like The L Word and Queer as Folk are just as hot as (if not hotter than) the love scenes in hetero stuff.

Forced seduction still doesn't bother me, no matter how many feminists tell me it should.

Bonobos...well...I'll leave those for Little CJ.

I dunno about thinking oneself into orgasm, but I've had several orgasms in my sleep while having sexy dreams. A couple of those orgasmic dreams were about women. Always makes my husband jealous.

Carolyn Jean said...

Barbara: Hey! Yes, it was all very interesting.

Renee: I studied a lot of evolutionary stuff in College, and it was just so fascinating! yeah, the forced seduction, it's one of those topics a person can see all sides of, isn't it?

Jill: Shh: I won't tell about the girl ape! And I can say I don't have those thinking skillz either!!

JenB: Totally agree about the human sex. Oh, and I guess you have SKILLZ!

Sarai said...

That was interesting LOL! I get the whole sex turns us on I think thats why women like reading about sex b/c then we can image it ourselves and that arouses us.
The force seduction thing depends on the situation I would enjoy it with someone I found attractive and wanted to do it with him anyway. .
As far as thinking yourself into an orgasm OMG I want that skill!!!!

Now as far as the apes no comment...

Serena said...

o goodness!

Tracy said...

omg I just love how your brain works Carolyn Jean! Truly I do. lol

It's interesting - yes I think all (I'm with Jenb - human) sex is sexy. Although yes, the forced seduction isn't really my cup of tea.

Kati said...

I think it's fascinating that the women in the article are reacting physiologically to the visual stimuli, but are reporting almost NO reaction on the keyboard.

I wonder if it goes back to the whole idea about "nice girls." You know? That's were somehow programmed not to admit to being turned on? That watching sex (or porn) is "nasty" and that we're not supposed to do it? And certainly we're not supposed to admit that it might turn us on.

It's a really interesting article, CJ.

And of course, as usual Little CJ adds just the right spice of randomness. ;o)

Kerry Allen said...

Little CJ can have the elves.

Tentacle prOn is where it's at.

I think "forced seduction" is too closely associated with "rape." If you back away from that term and look at as a domination fantasy, it's easier to see the narcissistic aspect. Woman makes man lose control = Woman has control.

Hot stuff.

little alys said...

Oh my, hot stuff. ;)
Yes, I've temporarily come out of hybernation (forced I tell you, focrced!) because this is just too hilarious.

Lil CJ...dude, I was just thinking about Cornelius...hooottzzzz. *coughcough*

As for the physical arousal, that would be understandable. All in the name of conception, breeding, evolution, bleh bleh bleh and blah blah blah. Chimpanzees. Hehehe.

Tumperkin said...

Hee hee hee *giggling*


oh yes, yes *stroking chin*

JenB said... also have orgasmic dreams about men (no apes though).

Just realized how my post sounded. LOLOL

I was just trying to say that my subconscious is very "equal opportunity" when it comes to sexual stimuli.

Carolyn Jean said...

Sarai: No comment on the apes?

Serena: *g*

Tracy: No Windflower for you?

Kati: That is a good point! I was sort of wondering that, too. Or maybe so programmed that we don't even know?

KA: Tentacle pron! Snort. Yeah, that narcissism thing totally added up in the way you say!

LA: Hey you!!! Glad to see you out and about!

TKin: You are so erudite.

JenB: Oh, hey, I got it! Everyone knows you're very into equal opp!!!!

naida said...

fun post littlecj and cj!
Cornelius kind of creeps me out :)

Debby said...

I still have last week's magazine section sitting on the kitchen table, and I haven't had time to finish this article yet. In the meantime, however, I wanted to know if you saw the article in Slate yesterday: "Debbie Does Salad: Do Vegetarians Really Have Better Sex?"

You have got to see the PETA commercial...yowza. And just for the record, I spell my name with a "Y" and I am only semi-vegetarian.

Carolyn Jean said...

Naida: Well, little CJ begs to differ!

Debby: I went and saw that article, because I saw the commercial on another blog. Thanks for the tip. Hmmm! It's a funny kerfluffle. But both sides can agree on french fries, hopefully.